Fluff Trials Ch.1 By Slime It was a cool cloudy October day and John was getting up at the sound of his alarm. He had set it to six o clock so he could get up and do the daily rituals. His cat was already on his bed meowing for breakfast as she usually did as he sat on his bed shaking the sleep away. He got up and went to the restroom to wash his face and have a piss before going down the hall to where a small closet was. He took out a small bag of dry cat food and poured some for his cat Janis who basically inhaled the stuff. As the cat ate her small food bowl in the hallway, John went into the living room where another door was just as you exited the archway. In that room were a family of fluffies he had kept since he found them trespassing in his backyard searching for food. It was a safe-room he made completely on his own and on a shoe string budget.

He opened the door and stepped over the small gate as he entered. He went in and opened the curtains to the room and let the sunlight flood in. This stirred the blue mare from her sleep a bit as the three foals on her back fluff slept peacefully.

“………Id am wakies time?” The mare asked in a sleepy tone. She then got each foal down from her back and gave them good morning hugs like she always did and set them down so she could go an eat.

“Wakies speshuw fwen. Id am wakies timsies.” The mare told the green stallion that was still sleeping on its side in the cheaply made nest.

“Nu wan, am su sweepy…..” The stallion said as he yawned. The mare only nudged him until he finally jutted up his head and woke up. They both waddled up to John as he stood there watching them and started to ask for their morning meal. “Can habs nummies daddeh? Mummah nee nummies tu make gud miwkies fo gud babbehs!” The blue mare said happily as she smiled up at John. The foals were already babbling away about being hungry and one was even crying already. There were three foals in the nest, one blue, one green, and one yellow, all of them earthies. While John went to the counter top nearby to fetch the dry fluffy kibble. The kibble itself was a cheap upon cheap substitute that John found on a South Korean site. The bag itself was covered in a lot of what looked like discount stickers but the fluffs ate it all the same. He poured a bit into their own bowls and went to go and look at the foals in the nest. He looked about in the nest but eventually found it, the little brown foal that he had left to sleep with the rest was now by the litter box. It hid behind the thing and looked out longingly at the foals in their nest. John went over and grabbed the brown foal to put it in the nest with the rest. The nest itself was made up of a small old dog bed and some old towels he found in the garage. “Nu wan poopie babbeh in nestie!” The blue filly colt said as he moved away from its sibling. “Mummah! Mummah, poopie babbeh am hewe!!” The green foal yelled out to its mother. The yellow foal only tried to scoot away from it as it squeaked in fright. The mare heard this and lifted her head to see what was all the racket. When she caught sight of the brown foal trying to make itself comfortable in the nest did she turn around and waddle up as fast as she could. “Nu wan poopie babbeh hewe!! Gu way!! Nu wan!!” The mare yelled at it as she then picked it up by the back fluff and flung it out of the nest where it landed with a hard thud on the floor a bit away. “Huuu!! Hab huwties! Mummah!!” The brown foals cried out as it lay on its side as it called out for its mother for comfort even though she is the one you hurt it. It always amazed John to see how easily these things forgot things and how they always went back to being abused, with only the smartest of them getting away which was rare enough as it is. “Why are you treating the little brown foal like that? It’s your baby and you need to take care of it.” John told the mare as the stallion made its way back to the nest burping. The mare was now getting ready to feed her foals as she lay on her side. She first put the blue and green foals first to feed, with the yellow colt having to wait its turn. “Nu wan dummeh poopie babbeh daddeh, Id am dummeh! Gud babbehs nee miwkies nao daddeh.” The blue mare told John in a matter of fact tone as if it was just a truth that was obvious. This angered John and so he pulled off the small blue colt from the teat and brought it up to the mare’s face. “If the brown babbeh doesn’t get to eat than this one doesn’t eat either.” He told the mare as he gave the chubby little foal a bit of a squeaz. “Nuuu!! Bestest babbeh nee miwkies!! Pwees daddeh, gib mummah bestest babbeh! Nu huwties babbeh!” She pleaded as she watched the foal’s eyes bug out a bit from the squeezing. “Then feed the brown one, and maybe I’ll let this one finish.” He told the mare as the stallion watched from the side in an anxious way. He grabbed the brown foal and put it at the mare’s teat next to the green colt that was stull sucking away fiercely. The brown foal first sniffed the teat and then latched on and started to drink with gusto as the mare only seemed to be disgusted with the entire thing. “Nuuu! Poopie babbeh dwink aww bestest babbehs miwkies!! Mummah!!!” The blue colt screamed as he wiggled and thrashed in John’s hand. The mare kept looking over at its “bestest babbeh” as it was going to disappear soon. When the brown foal finished and was now sitting on its rump burping did the green foal also sit back. Both foals were fed and full as he then put the blue colt on the teat to finish up what was left. The yellow foal was waddling up to the mare’s teat when it was stopped by the chubby mother. “Dancie babbeh make gud dancies fo mummah!” The mare demanded as the yellow foal looked at her with a hungry expression. “Bu bu mummah, am suuuu hungies! Pwees, cans hab gud miwkies?” The foal asked as the he sat on his rump. The mare only shook its head and so the little yellow foals head fell as it knew what it had to do. It got up on its hind legs and did a little jig as he waved its littles front hooves around in semi circles. All the while the foal watched the blue colt suck up the milk and danced harder as it was afraid it was going to run out, and usually it did. When the mare was satisfied, she giggled letting the yellow foal know that she was pleased with its little dance and that it could now drink some milk. The foal waddled up as fast as it could and latched on to the nipple and drank a few mouthfuls before it was depleted. Such was the fate of the yellow dancie babbeh, John didn’t like the ranking system but he had a few things in store for this particular fluffy family since they were so found of the system. “Gud babbehs, mummah wub yu!” The mare said to the three as she gave them a hug each. The brown foal only held its head low as it watched its siblings get the love and attention he never would. Just then the green stallion went up to the now fed foals and grabbed the green and blue foals so he could take them by the toys in the middle of the room. He always played with the foals every morning but always made the yellow foal follow and never let the brown foal play, not even once. The last time John tried to the stallion to play with the brown foal, he ended up biting a little bit of its side fluff off which traumatized the little thing since it now hid anytime the green stallion was near. “Pway wid toysies babbhes! Hewe am stuffy fwen heehee!”The stallion said as he brought over a stuffy friend for his precious green foal to play with. The three foals took turns hugging the stuffy friend as their father played with his stacking blocks like he loved to do. John noticed the brown foal trying to get close to the foals playing as it inched closer and closer. “Can poopie babbeh pway wid stuffy fwen? Wan huggies…..” The brown foal said to the three foals playing nearby. The chubby blue colt was he first to step up as it puffed out its little cheeks and stomped its front right hoof. “Nu! Poopie babbeh nu ged pway wid stuffy fwen o ged huggies!!”. “Gu way dummeh o mummah gon gib yu huwties!!” The green colt yelled out following up its blue brother’s declaration. The yellow foal only looked on sadly as it didn’t know what to do. The Blue foal then blew a raspberry at its unfortunate brother. The commotion made the green stallion turn its head to see what was going on. “Dummeh poopie babbeh!! Gu way! Nu can pway wid gud babbehs!!” The stallion yelled as it charged the brown foal and pushed it away with its head. The little thing rolled away and into a heap of old t-shirts that were on the floor. “Huuhuuhuuu!” The little brown colt cried as it lay on its side wiggling its little hooves in pain. These things were always doing stuff like this even when John was around trying to correct them. He felt as long as they didn’t kill the little thing everything was alright. He just wondered how they treated the poor thing when he wasn’t around. He walked over to the stallion and picked up its three stacking blocks and set them on top of the counter nearby. “Nuu!! Daddeh, pwees nu take way bwockieeees!! Am gud fwuffeh!” The stallion pleaded as he watched his blocks sit on top of the counter. The stallion jumped on his hooves and eventually waddled up to the counter and stood on his hind legs to try and reach the blocks but he was far too small. “Huuhuu!! Am gud fwuffeh!!” The stallion wailed in a bratty way as John went over to the three foals and took away their stuffy friend. “Nu! Babbeh wan toysie!!” The blue colt cried as it sat on its rump wailing to the ceiling. John just set it on the counter as well. The mare was just watching from the nest as this all went down. It had been two weeks since he had captured the fluffies in his backyard and set them in the safe-room. Since the mare had her foals in the room, they had never been out of it. John felt it was now time since he wanted to take them to the backyard. He stood up from kneeling on the floor and clasped his hands together to get the fluffies attention. ‘” Ok guys, we are heading outside so you gather up the babbehs and follow me!” He told them as he scooted the foals over to the mother and snapped his fingers to call over the stallion who was still trying to reach his blocks. The mare put the blue and green foals on her back and the stallion went and grabbed the yellow foal. Once they had their foals on their backs, they looked up at him waiting. “I think you forgot one, here let me help you.” John told them as he plucked the brown colt from the floor and deposited him on the stallions back. Immediately the stallion grunted with dissatisfaction and bucked a bit trying to get the foal off but ended up dropping both. It looked like they were just going to have to keep up with the group. John went and opened the door moving the small gate to the side so the fluffies could pass. As they stepped outside the safe room, the mare and stallion looking back and forth from the doorway to make sure everything was safe before actually stepping out. Seeing that it was clear of danger the both waddled on when suddenly Janis leapt out from behind the door and tackled the fat blue mare making her spill her two foals onto the floor. The cat dug its claws into the mare’s side as it also bit into the neck playfully. The cat always loved messing around with things and saw the fluffies for what they truly were, play things. The foals wanted to waddle back to their mother but were too scared of the cat so they raced to their father instead. The stallion only backed up from the cat and the mare as it watched in horror. “Nuu!! Nu huwt mummah!! Daddeh, mummah nee hewp!!” The stallion called up to John as he stood there also watching the cat have its fun. The mare was screaming and kicking with all its might to get the cat to stop gnawing on her but the cat only dug in deeper taking chunks of flesh as she went. John shooshed the cat away and so the cat bounded off leaving the mare a crying mess on the floor. “Huuuu!! Mummah hab huwties!! Hewp daddeh!!” The mare screamed as she lay on her side bleeding from where the cat ripped out the chunks of blue fluff. The mare soon got up and onto its hooves and started to look for its foals that it had on its back. “Whewe am babbeh!? Babbeh!! Cum tu mummah!!” The mare called out momentarily forgetting her pain as she searched for her precious foals. “Babbeh am hewe mummah!” The fat blue colt replied as it waddled from behind its father. It was followed by its green sibling as it waddled as fast as it could to its mother. The stallion went up and helped the mare put the two foals on her back as the brown and yellow foals stayed on the ground behind their father. John had just about enough of this interruption so he gave the mare and stallion a scoot with his foot. Once they were moving along and following John to the kitchen did the yellow foal speak up a bit. “Nu wan wawkies. Wan wide in fwuff wid mummah!” The yellow foal whined as it was getting tired. The brown foal only waddled along with its head down behind the family. The mare kept looking from side to side for signs of the cat anxiously taking a pause here and there to listen. John didn’t have patience for this so he would give the mare a little kick every so often to keep her moving. “Nu huwt gud mummah!” The mare cried as she kept moving. The thing was now calling itself a “gud mummah”, John couldn’t believe it. The mare and the rest of the family had finally made it to the door leading to the backyard that was at the end of the kitchen. He opened the door and waited for the fluffies to step outside. The mare was still scared from the cat and didn’t want to cross the threshold and started to back away. “Nuh uh.” John said as he then proceeded to give the mare a firm kick in the ass making her flip forward and hit the ground hard as she slammed her head onto the pavement. The blue and green colts went flying off their mothers’ fluff once again and onto the hard pavement themselves. “EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! Weggie huwties weggie huwties!!” The green foal cried out as its little front right leg was bent in an odd position. The blue foal was crying about its pain on its side as it called out for its mother. With the stallion waddling up to the mare to try and help her he left the two other foals behind as they raced to keep up with him. “Speshuw fwen!! Babbeh hab huwties!! Weggie am hab huwties!!” The green stallion panickily yelled at the mare. “Wha? Babbeh hab huwties?? Babbeh nee huggies!!” The mare shouted back as she picked up the small green colt that was trying to stand up. It was plucked off the floor and put into a hard embrace that it wiggled against. “Nuu mummah!! Huggies am gib huwties!! Eeeeee!!” The thing went as it tried to slip out of its mothers’ embrace. The mother finally put the foal down after much crying and moaning but as soon as foal was on the floor did it try again to stand up and move about failing each attempt. The small thing was now on its rump holding its right leg up in pain as it throbbed in a swollen mess. John left the fluffies to move around on the pavement on the patio while he went to go and get a small cage he had on the side of the house. He retrieved it and looked it over as he made sure it was still solid. When he brought the cage to the main area of the backyard, he put it on the floor next to the mare. The mare and stallion immediately started to panic and shout up at John. “Nuuuu!! Nu wan sowwy box daddeh!!” The stallion shouted as he looked up fearfully at John. The mare was slower on the uptake as she then got the hint that it was something bad at the sight of her special friend freaking out. It seemed that the stallion was the one who came from a household whereas the mare was probably a feral that came from nothing and thus was ignorant to what the cage meant. The foals were also none the wiser but eventually picked up on their father’s fear and soon all the fluffies were either begging or crying up a storm. “Oh no, this is for only one of you? Now which one of you should go in there? Only one and it has to be from your family, ok.” John explained to the fluffies hoping that they would just get it. “Nuuuu!! Daddeh pwees nu make gud famwy gu in sowwy box! Am sowwy!!” The stallion yelled pleadingly as he was the first to understand what was going on. The mare just went over and snatched up both the green and blue colt in a massive hug trying to keep them close as she felt something wrong with how the stallion was begging. “Nope, one of you is going in so you better choose. Choose now or Im going to give the bestest babbeh hurties.” John threatened. The tension was in the air was the mare and the stallion looked at each other and then to the two foals that were behind the stallion. The yellow foal was trying to get his father to hug him with its front hooves raised up in a “wan huggies” pose as these things usually did. “Nu wan! Aww babbehs am gud babbehs and mummah am gud mummah!!” The stallion said as it didn’t even consider itself for the task. They continued looking about as they didn’t know what to do until the green stallion laid its eyes on the little brown foal that was next to the yellow foal asking for a hug. “Huggies daddeh? Poopie babbeh wan huggies!” It spoke up to its father as it tried to stat standing on its hind legs. The stallion stared at the brown foal until something finally clicked. It looked up at John and pointed to the brown foal with its head. “Dis babbeh! Poopie babbeh gu tu sowwy box daddeh! An famwy ged nummies??” The stallion said as it asked for food in hopes that it did something good. It had chosen the brown foal, the designated poopie babbeh. Such was the fate of most brown foals to be the first to be given up, it made John’s fire grow. “Is that right, you want this one to go in the sorry box?” John asked the mare as she held her two colts close to her chest turning her body so that the foals weren’t visible to John. “Nu wan dummeh poopie babbeh! Can habs nummies?” The mare asked asfter condeming the brown foal. The brown colt heard all this and its little ears lowered as it started to sniffle a bit as it looked at its mother and father. “Poopie babbeh am saddies! Huuhuuu!” The thing went. John made up his mind as he then yanked the mare by a chunk of blue fluff that was left on her side and threw her into the cage. He closed the door and let the mare scramble to get up and make her way to the cage’s door. She stuck her hoof out from the gap in the bars and started to wail. “Nuuuu!! Wet mummah out!! Babbehs nee mummah! Ged dummeh poopie babbeh!!!” The mare squealed as snot fell down from her nose and the tears flowed. John was pleased with his decision as the mare’s misery was pleasing but it was only just beginning for the chubby little bio toy. “Speshuw fwen!! Nuuu!! Wet gud mummah out!!” The stallion cried out as he ran up to the cage and got on his hind legs to try and paw at the cage. “Mummah!” “babbeh hab weggie huwties mummah!!” “Huuhuuhuu!!” The foals all went as they didn’t know how to process what was happening. The stallion was now trying to bite the bars with his dull fluffy teeth but go nowhere except some pain in his mouth. After a few attempts the stallion ended up losing a tooth as blood dripped out his mouth. “Mouthie huwties!!!” The sight was a funny one as John giggled a bit at the sight of the stallion panicking about his tooth loss. The foals were now waddling toward the cage trying to see if they could fit through the bars once there. John picked up the cage and took it to the middle of the backyard and set it on the grass. The fluffies followed john and were now around the cage begging the mare to be outside with them. The little green foal was still limping its way to the cage when John gave it a shove backwards with his foot sending it rolling until stopped in the tall grass. “Eeeeeeee!! Weggieeee!!! Huuuu!!!” The foal cried out as its bad leg got banged up some more. All the crying and begging was getting to John so he went to the palapa that was to the corner of the backyard and dug through a chest filled with random tools and equipment. He found what he was looking for as he pulled out a stake and some twine. He went over to the fluffies and picked up the little fat blue colt and brought it over to a few feet away from the mother’s cage and jammed the stake in the ground, getting a rock that was laying nearby to hammer it at the way in. He then got the twine and wrapping around the little foals’ genitals tightly. He made sure to really put the pressure on the little colt so that it really felt it. “EEEEEEEEEEE!!! SPESHUW WUMP HUWTIES!! NU NU STICK HUWTIIIIEEEEESSS!!! EEEEEEEEE!!!” The colt screamed as John set it down and tied the other end to the stake. The little thing wiggles on its side kicking its little legs as it kept on screaming like crazy about its “special lumps and no no stick”. The green stallion didn’t know what to do as he looked from the foal to the mare and then to John. “Pweees daddeh, hewp gud famwy!! Dey am gud fwuffehs!! Pwees daddeh!!” It begged as it waddled up to Johns leg. “You all will stay out here from now on. No more safe room, no more nestie, and no more nummies get it? You are now outside fluffies.” He told the stallion and mare. They looked at him scared and wide eyed as he turned around to leave them. “Nuuu daddeh!! Nu weave! Am sowwy daddeh!! Famwy nee daddeh!!” The stallion begged as he tried to follow John but he only gave it a kick backwards. John closed the door to the backyard as he went over to the fridge. He grabbed a water bottle and drank a bit as he thought about what the fluffies would be up to the next day he checked in on them, for now he had things to do and work that needed to get done. He threw the water bottle in the trash as he bent down to get to the cupboard under the sink. Inside it was a box that was rumbling as something inside was crying softly. He gave the box a shake and let the thing inside scream in fright as it hit the side of the small box. He opened the door to the box and poured out a white stallion with ratty fluff. This fluffy smelled terrible as it had feces caked on its back side and on its side of its fluff. The box also contained a pool of urine within it that poured out with the stallion. The white fluffy was an earthie and was trying to cower into a ball to hide itself. “Nu huwt fwuffeh nu mo…..nu wan sowwy boxie……”The stallion cried softly as it shivered in fear. John smiled as he looked down at the pathetic sight. He knelt down to look at the fluffy directly. “Are you ready for today?” John asked the stallion as it cried even harder in its pitiful puddle of urine and feces.

It was a hot October afternoon out with the sun shining down on a medium sized green house in an ordinary looking neighborhood. On this property sat a palapa in a backyard filled to the brim of every type of plant that could survive in such a hot environment. In the palapa that was now after years of use, lop sided and about to fall in on itself sat Chris. Chris was a man of thirty and was now living in his parents’ old home since they had moved to be closer to his younger sisters that were a few hours away. The time went by alright as Chris did his thing and worked on a novel, living off of the bit of money he had saved up from the few years of working.  He usually sat in the palapa with the T.V. blaring some music as he sat at a white picnic table typing away at his laptop. The day always started with Chris getting up from the couch in the living room, grabbing an energy drink and then heading outside where his setup was. He would work on the novel he kept trying to finish but was always distracted with internet nonsense.  On this Saturday morning while Chris was watering the plants, he went and opened the back gate that led to a small ditch and then a whole bunch of bush to haul a few bags of backyard debris out that way. He would then take them around the house to the side where the garbage bins were. Once the trash was taken out and the plants were all watered did Chris finally sit back down and put some music on so he could write. The music went on and Chris himself got into a bit of a flow as he started to write his novel with the words just pouring out of him until he heard a loud squeal.  He stopped what he was doing and lowered the music as he turned around to find out where the noise was coming from as he twisted in the old rocking chair, he sat in.  “EEEEEEEEEEEE!!!” The sound went as Chris looked for the source.  There was an abundance of plants and bushes with trees dotting here and there. Chris had a green thumb passed down to him from his mother and so Chris made sure that everything was kept alive. There were some rose bushes to the far end along the wall with some boganbillias, and that it seemed was where the noise was coming from. As Chris got off his chair and made his way past the maze of potted plants and to the corner, the squealing could only be heard getting louder. There on the dirt there seemed to be a bunch of limbs from the rose bush and the boganbillias scattered across the floor. With Chris following the scattered limbs he then found a two fluffies yelling and crying that they had stepped on said thorny branches.  There was a tiny little blue earthie foal that was wiggling its back leg a bit as it had a nasty bit of thorny branch stuck to its soft little hoof. There was also a bigger blue earthie stallion that was at the edge of the scattered thorny limbs and was shouting for the foal to come to him.  “Gud babbeh!! Cum tu daddeh!!” The blue stallion shouted at the tiny foal as it continued to kick its back right leg.  “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! HUWTIES!! HUWTIES DADDEH!! HUUHUUHUUU!!!” The small thing yelled at the top of its lungs.  Chris watching all this from a few feet away behind a giant cactus, it seemed he was invisible to the two fluffies. The stallion did a nervous dance as he looked at his foal in the middle of the thorny madness. He looked like he didn’t know what to do, and so he continued to call his foal to him.  Babbeh nee cum tu daddeh! Cum hewe babbeh!” The stallion pleaded.  The foal was wailing and crying about the branch that was stuck to its hoof when it tried to limp forward towards its father. The foal only took two hops forward and then face planted into the branches on the floor.  “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!” The little thing screamed as it now had thorns stuck to its underside.  The little foal actually started to roll a bit and only served to get a few more thorns stuck to its little body. It only made its situation worse as it wailed for help, the stallion useless of course as he stood by dancing nervously on the sidelines watching it all go down. Chris felt it was time to step out from behind the cactus since he couldn’t take any more of the fluffies screaming.  “SCREEE MUNSTUH!! WUN WAY BABBEH!!” The stallion screamed out wide eyed as it saw Chris’s form come from behind the giant cactus.  The Stallion waddled away as fast as it could under a bush that was nearby as it yelled for its “gud babbeh” to follow it. The sight was pathetic and it made Chris massage his temples. Chris was probably an intimidating figure to a fluffy since he was six foot one and a giant in fluffy standards. He went and plucked the struggling screaming foal from the pile of thorns and put it in the pot the giant cactus grew from and then went to try and grab the blue stallion from under the bush. Chris got on his knees and then picked up the bush and lifted it as much as he could to see the underside. He was not prepared for what he saw. It was an entire family underneath. He was looking now at the blue stallion, a pink mare with a red and white foal on her back. The family coward together as they looked with their little terrified eyes at Chris reach for them. Lucky for Chris there were a few big planter pots nearby that weren’t being used at the moment so he made us of them.  He grabbed the stallion first and threw it into a nearby pot. He reached for the mare but she gave him a little bite on the knuckle which prompted Chris to slap it across the face without thinking. The mare went to one side dropping her two foals from their perfect warm perch and sent them rolling across the floor.  “Eeeeee!!”  Mummah!!” The two foals went as the fell across the floor.  The mare was then snatched up by the fluff on her side and thrown into another empty pot. The mare went in with a hard thud, but Chris’s anger was now subsiding as he then scooped up the two foals from the floor. They wiggled in his grasped calling out for their mother.  Mummmmmahhhh!!!” The red foal yelled out with its head searching this way and that.  Eeeeee munstuh!! Mummah hewp babbeh!!” The little white foal wailed as it was getting ready to cry.  He deposited the foals into two separate smaller pots and then crossed his arms as he looked at the family in their own pots, all of them crying and carrying on with their wailing. After a minute of standing there, he decided that he would keep them separated but first he had to go and close the gate since that was more than likely the cause for this intrusion. He made his way to the back dodging branches as he went along till, he finally came upon the back gate. It was wide open like his dumbass had left it, as he reached to close it, he heard some rustling going on the other side. He slowly poked his head around the corner of the gateway. In front of him were three more fluffies, two seemed to be stallions and then there was a mare. The first stallion was a dull yellow, the second a tired dull green, the mare was a light brown and all three were waddling around nervously.  “Am hungies! Nee nummies fo gud babbehs huu!” The brown mare said loudly as she waddled in a small half circle.  Chris retracted his head as he thought about what to do. There was three full grown fluffies and apparently the mare had some foals although Chris didn’t see any initially. He walked back to where the crying fluffy family were and picked up two crates that sat empty by the giant cactus and brought them to the open gate. He put down the black crate and held the red one in both hands as he prepared to jump out and snatch up hopefully all the damn feral bio toys that were out there. He took a breath and then jumped out and tried to bend down and catch the first fluffy he saw, instead he over stepped and ended up stepping on the dull green stallions’ backside. It all just caved in under Chris’s foot as its little eyes bugged out hard and had its mouth open in a silent scream. It all went to shit as Chris tried to right himself but only ended up slipping on the fluffy more, streaking red fluffy juice on the ground.  Munstuh!! Wun way!!” The dark yellow stallion screamed out as he struggled to waddle in the opposite direction.  Nuuu!! Munstuh am bad fo babbehs!! Mummah wun!!” The light mare yelled as she too tried to turn her girth around to waddle away.  Sadly, the fluffies were pathetically slow and it didn’t take much for Chris to correct himself and snatch up the two escaping fluffs. He threw the yellow stallion into the crate as it hit the bottom face first. He then grabbed the brown mare and as he yanked her up by the back leg, Chris saw a few little fluff balls fall down onto the dirt. He dropped the mare on top of the yellow stallion and let them figure out how to right themselves. Chris was now leaning over looking at the foals that had dropped from the mares’ fluff. They seemed to be all around the same color, some type of shade of brown. There were three of them in all, two earthies and one being a wingie fluff. They tried their best to move around on shaky legs as the picked themselves off the floor, it didn’t take them long to start panicking.  “Chirp chirp chirp!” A brown earthie called out as it looked around for its mother.  “Peep!!” The wingie foal let out as it sniffed the air for any hint of where its mother might be.  The third brown foal just balled up on the floor and was crying to itself. Chris only picked them up and looked them once over and could see that the foals were taken care of despite being brown, he guessed since the mother was also a brown fluffy. All the fluffies went into the crate and then brought into the backyard as he closed the gate this time. He separated the stallion and the mare into different crates and then grabbed the foals and threw them into on the grass. They peeped as they fell onto the soft grass, Chris sat on a lawn chair and stared at the three brown foals waddled around calling out for their mother the only way they knew how.  He sat there in the chair with his eyes closed listening to the fluffies cry out. The sound was so annoying to him and now that he thought about it, the sounds seemed almost repulsive. He gripped the arms of the chair until his knuckled were white as the sounds only seemed to get louder. He had gone most of his time avoiding these damn bio toys since he mostly stayed indoors and when he went out, he usually just side stepped any feral begging for food, never giving them the time of day. It had been a few years since the whole fluffy thing exploded into the mainstream and now, they were just another pest released into the wild world.  He turned and looked at the palapa and saw his laptop out and thought about finishing what he was doing but then the sounds of the wailing fluffies came back into his ear and he clenched his teeth. He knew what he should do and it was clear to him now. Chris stood up, went to fetch the crates of the mare and stallion. He deposited the foals with the yellow stallion as he brought them all over to the palapa. He put the two crates in the middle on a small coffee table that sat in the middle of the area.  He decided that he was going to leave the other fluffies in their planters for a bit while he figured something out with the ones he had currently. He looked out at the sky and could feel a nice little breeze make its way through; he then had an idea. He would decorate his place, with it being October and all he thought it was the perfect time to put up some Halloween stuff. He had a box or two filled with some decorations for the spooky season and so he set out to fish them out.  With the whole pandemic that was going around Chris was sure that there wasn’t really going to any sort of Halloween celebrations, but he was determined to decorate regardless since October was his favorite time of the year.  He made his way into the house leaving the fluffies in their crates to cry and made his way to the garage. Once he was passed the kitchen and in the garage itself, he looked through the mess of things for the box marked “Halloween”.  “There we go!” He said out loud as he located what he was looking for.  The box was under many others things so it took him a little while to fully dig it out but in the end he was victorious. He hauled the big box out to the living room and took out his trusty pocket knife to cut the tape off. He looked at the glorious contents and picked up a medium sized metal pumpkin and let the memories flood back of previous Halloweens and the bullshit he’s be up to. He went about setting most of the contents on the floor and then went out back to fetch the fluffies. In the palapa he stacked the two crates and brought them inside to the living room where he set them down.  Huuhuubabbehs!! Cum tu mummah!!” The mare called out as she could see the foals in the other crate trying to avoid being stepped on by the nervous yellow stallion.  “Chirp chirp peep!!” The foals called out as they did their best to not get trampled by the stallion that was moving around.  Huuu! Nu wike sowwy box!! Wet gud fwuffeh out!!” The stallion wailed as he looked around for a way out through the holes in the crate.  Chris only got out a few small candles and the rest of the metal pumpkin set which were three in all. He went over to the coffee table in the middle of the living room where his speaker was and turned it on so he could put a song on his phone. Once he had a good song going, he went about lighting the candles for the metal pumpkins. He figured he could use some atmosphere to get into the mood. He placed a candle in each pumpkin and sat back on the floor as he looked at them glow. It was always a pleasant sight to see some jack o lanterns lit up for Chris, the memories already flooding in. He remembered when he was young, his friends and him would go around raising hell and getting drunk. The sounds of the crying fluffies brought him back from his nostalgia trip. He smiled as he then reached over and dumped the crate with the stallion and foals onto the living room floor. Right away the stallion got up and started to waddle away from him leaving the foals on their sides wiggling around.  “WUN WAY!! NU WAN BE NUMMIES FO MUNSTUH HUUUU!!!” The stallion cried out as it tried to get under one of the couches but ended up getting stuck halfway through.  Chris only chuckled and turned his attention to the three foals now all wobbly trying to go to the crate their mother wad calling them from.   “Cum tu mummah gud babbehs!! Mummah am hewe!!” The mare called to her foals as they were getting closer.  The foals were already at the side of the crate poking their little heads through the holes in the crate as their mother tried to lick them and pull them through the holes. She yanked on their little heads one by one as they chirped in pain and tried to get free of her grasp, she eventually stopped as their pain was now clear to her.  “CHIRP CHIRP!!” The one brown earthie let out as it wiggled its head back and forth.  The other two were now on their rumps crying with their little front hooves at their faces. The sight only served to light a fire in him.  “You like your foals? Which one is the bestest? Which one is the poopie babbeh? Which one is the dancie babbeh??” Chris asked the mare as he moved the crate so she could look at him.  Huuu, aww mummahs babbehs am bestest babbehs! Wan babbehsBabbehs nee mummah!!” The mare yelled as she cowered from Chris’s hard gaze.  “You like all of em huh? Ok we’ll see about that”.  He then grabbed the light brown wingie foal by its little wing pinching it tight. The small bio toy chirped in pain as it was brought upwards.  “Nu!! Nu huwt gud wingie babbeh!! Babbeh nee wingies fo fwying!!” The mare pleaded.  Chirs lifted the top on the first metal jack o lantern and dropped the wingie foal into it. He then grabbed the other two brown earthie foals and dropped them into their own pumpkin. They all tried as best to keep away from the flame in the middle of the pumpkin but could only get so far until they were met with a metal wall. They could go no further, their confinement only adding to their fear. Chris grabbed the mare’s crate and placed it in front of the jack o lanterns and let her watch for a bit.  Hewp fwuffeh!! Am stuckies!! Hewp!! Huuuhuuu!!” The yellow stallion could be heard crying and struggling to free himself from under the couch.  Chris looked back at the stallion as it wiggled its rump trying to get out. He just flipped his knife open and crawled over to the stallion’s rump and gave it a few light pokes here and there.  “SCREEEEEEE!!! HUWTIES!! NUUUUUU!!!”.  The stallion struggled even harder but was too fat so there he remained with a bit of blood leaking from his backside. Satisfied with himself he went back to kneel by the mare in her crate. She was now trying to reach out for her foals through the crate holes and had snot running down her face as she continued to cry.  Babbehs nuu!! Babbehs am scawdies, nee mummah!!! Wet mummah gu!!” she pleaded.  “You need to make one bestest, one dancie and one poopie babbeh. I’ll give them to you before they get hurt if you do that” He told the mare calmly as he moved the crate closer to the foal’s pumpkins.  “Bu bu….”.  “No buts, you need to pick now” He said more sternly.  The foals were now in full panic mode as the heat inside the metal jack o lantern was steadily rising. They clambered at the pumpkins mouth and tried to get out but the teeth only held them in. Chris decided to make it easier for the mare so he put the first brown wingie foal’s pumpkin in front of the mare’s crate. It held its little hoof out of the pumpkins mouth, reaching out for its mother in desperation.  “CHIIIRP!!” It cried out as it struggled to get away from the heat inside.  Chris lit another candle and set it inside with the wingie foal doubling the heat.  “CHIRP CHIIRP!!” The little thing went as it struggled even harder.  “Better choose before your foal gets burned” Chris told the mare in a sing song tone.  Nuuu!! Babbeh!! Dat… dat am bestest babbehh!!! Wet babbeh gu pweeees!!” The mare begged as she also reached out for her foal with tears rolling down her small face.  He blew out the candles in the wingie foals pumpkin and moved the first brown earthie foal’s jack o lantern in front of the mare as it moved around the candle looking for a way out.  “Now is this a dancie babbeh?” Chris asked the feral mare, sick at the thought of talking like these damn things.  *SNIFF SNIFF “Babbeh……babbeh am…….dat am dancie babbeh….Huuuu!” The mare said sadly as she watched he foal waddle around helplessly.  “Ok, now make it dance then. I wanna see it dance”.  “Bu bu babbeh nu knu how tu dancie?!” The mare said a bit panicked.  “Not my problem, make it dance or I’ll do it for you” He told the mare a bit angrily.  The mare seemed to understand since she started calling out to the foal for its attention.  Babbeh! Cum tu mummah an an make gud danciesPwees make gud dancies fo mummah huuu!!” The mare pleaded her foal.  The foal heard its mother calling out to it and waddled to the pumpkins face and started to reach out for her. It tried to get its little head through but couldn’t so it fell back close to the candle and eeped in fright. The thing was on its rump crying with it head tossed back as its mother fought for its attention again.  “Wook babbeh!! Dancies!! Dancies wike mummah!! Make gud dancies fo mummah babbeh!!” The mare told it as she did a dance for the foal to see.  The foal stopped its crying for a bit and watched its mummah do her frantic dance on her hind legs as she moved her front hooves about. She tipped toed trying to dance and balance as best as possible before falling back. She got up and did her dance again until it looked like the foal was getting the idea. Sniffling the foal got managed after two tries to get on his hind legs and wave his front hooves a bit. It fell down again but its mother encouraged it to continue.  “Dancies babbeh!! Make gud dancies fo mummah pwees!”.  The foal got back up and did better dance this time managing to actually stay up longer. Chris nodded and blew out the candle in there with the earthie foal. The foal started to peep in terror of the dark as Chris scooted the jack o lantern aside to make way for the last one. When the last brown earthie foal was in front of the crying mare it looked like it was scratching at the back wall of the pumpkin as if it was trying to dig itself out.  “Wet babbehs guuu!!! Dey nee mummah!! Babbehs nee miwkies an wub!! Huuu!!” She begged Chris but he still had one more thing in store for the mare to learn.  “No, now whats this one? Is it a poopie babbeh?” He asked the mare.  The mare stopped sniffling and looked at him and shook her head.  “Nu! Aww mummah babbehs am gud bestest babbehs!!”.  “No, that one is the bestest, that one is a dancie babbeh, and this one must be the poopie babbeh. Doesn’t have anything else to be except that, so might as well get used to calling it that.” Chris told the mare as he shook her crate a bit.  “Now call it a poopie babbeh or Imma hurt all the babbehs”.  The mare stayed still staring at her last foal try to dig its way out the back wall when Chris decided to speed things up a bit. This time he went and lit two extra candles, depositing them into the last foal’s pumpkin. This really lit a fire under the foal’s ass as it had barley any room to move around now. The temperature was surely rising at a higher rate this time around. The peeped and chirped like crazy as it now touched its side into the hot wax surrounding the wick. Its little side was matted down with hot wax and it flailed on its side kicking its little legs.  “Better hurry” He told the mare sitting cross legged on the floor next to all the comotion.  “Poo….poopie……POOPIE BABBEH!! HUUU!! POOPIE BABBEH!! PWEES WET BABBEH GU!!” The mare pleaded as she repeated the word over and over at the little brown foal.  The foal was too busy freaking out about getting burnt by the wax to notice its mothers calling it such a name so Chris went and blew out the candles now satisfied. He went at dumped each foal on the hard tile floor and let them wiggle in pain. The mare shouted for her foals but before he was to give them to her he was going to explain something to her.  “This one here is the bestest so it gets all the love no matter what ok?” He told the mare in her crate as he held the wingie foal in his palm in front of the crate.  He dropped the foal on top of the mare’s fluff and watched it roll off to the floor of the crate.  “This one is a dancie babbeh, and will have to dance for everything. This includes milk, hugs, fluffpile, and especially love in general.” He told the mare holding now the brown dancie foal in his palm before also dropping it in the crate with its mother.  He then grabbed the last brown foal that he saw now that he looked at it was the darkest out of the three.  “Now this, this is the poopie babbeh. It won’t get any hugs, love or fluffpile. It will only get fed so that it doesn’t die, besides that just keep this one away from the other babbehs ok” He finished telling the mare as he then left the foal outside the crate.  He knew that the mare hadn’t registered all the rules but he was going to help her out since he now decided to keep these fluffies around for a little while since it now seemed like something he was going to want to do.  The mare was busy hugging the wingie foal as the dancie foal was looking up sitting down with its hooves out asking for a hug. Chris let them be before continuing with the day’s lessons. He made his way to the couch were the yellow stallion was still stuck kicking his back legs as he sobbed uncontrollably. The blood was still fresh on his back side, the wounds dotting the flesh. The stallion heard you get close behind it and started to freak out even more as he tried again to get himself through the gap. Chris grabbed the stallions little fluffy tail and backed away a bit as the stallion started to wet itself.  Huuhuuhuuu nuuuuu!!! Nu num gud fwuffeh huuu!!!” The yellow thing begged as it cried harder this time.  He went back side stepping the urine and grabbed the stallion’s tail again and gave it a tug. This time the stallion shat itself a little, the liquid shit pouring down onto the tile. Chris then grabbed his knife and stretched out the tail to put the blade right at its base. He slid the knife down slowly severing the fluffies tail altogether.  “SCREEEEEEEEE!!! NUUUUU!!! PWETTY TAIW!! SCREEEEEEE!!!”.  The stallion screamed itself until it began again to try and get away, scooting its back hooves on the tile uselessly. Chris had enough of these shenanigans and stood up to go the kitchen and grab his rolled cigarette he usually had waiting for him up on the kitchen table. He always made sure to roll one and have it ready for the morning as it was his daily ritual. He grabbed the lighter from the kitchen drawer nearby and lit the thing up. He took a moment to take a drag or two before making his way back to the living room now feeling the nicotine rush a bit. He ignored the mare in her crate and the brown foal begging to be let in as it chirped for love. He went right over to the stuck stallion and then ashed his cigarette on its back fluff. He got closer as he bent over with the lit cig and the slower brought it to the stallion’s yellow back fluff. The stallion was still kicking to get away as it wailed about its tail pain. The fluff started to slowly burn away before lighting up a bit. Eventually the cigarette made its way past the fluff and onto the skin but Chris kept it hovering right above the flesh.  “SCREEEE!! BUWNIES BUWNIES!! HUWTIES!!” The stallion screamed as it felt the intense burn from the lit cigarette on its sensitive flesh.  He decided he needed to do a bit more so he grabbed one of the stallions back leg and turned the cigarette off on the bottom of its hoof. He did the same to the other hoof, the stallion was wailing like never before at this new development. He took his light and burned the side of the stallion’s leg and thighs a bit making sure to really make it raw. The stallion was beside himself and had stopped struggling as he now just lay there crying with his back legs quivering every now and again. He yanked out the stallion by one of his burnt-up legs and let him roll to the other side of the living room. The stallion tried to stand up but only fell back down as his backside was to battered up.  Chris sat on his recliner in front of the fluffies trying to figure where to put them. He didn’t want to really fix up one of the rooms or closets since it he would have to move a bunch of stuff out so he settled on the garage. It was hot in there but the fluffies would learn to love it he thought to himself.  “Ok, let’s do this!” Chris said as he stood up and clapped his hands together.  He left the fluffies in the living room knowing they wouldn’t get anywhere really with the mare being in the crate and the stallion unable to waddle around.  He had brought the speaker with him into the garage and but some good ol grindcore on as he then set to work on making an area to the fluffies.  The day went fast as one hour turned into a few and by the time Chris sat back on the floor of the garage he looked around at his handy work. All the boxes were now piled up on either side leaving a giant open square in the middle of the garage. He had found a roll of chicken wire amongst the piles of junk and decided to make the fence for the pen area. After some DIY effort and some good ol elbow grease was the chicken wire now a surrounding fence. He made sure that the structure couldn’t be pushed down by a fluffy so he gave it a test. Now he just needed something for a litter box and some fluffy food and he was in business.   He made his way back to the living room to find the fluffies a little calmer. The yellow stallion was lay next to the leg of the coffee table with his head down. The mare was curled around her two foals in the crate with her as she stared sadly at the little brown foal outside still begging to be let in. The little brown now poopie babbeh was still chirping and nudging the crate to try and be with its siblings and mother. The yellow stallion hid its head under its front hooves as it caught sight of Chris and started to tremble murmuring to itself in fright. The mare only curled even tighter around the two foals she had. He wasted no time in throwing the yellow stallion into the crate like a free throw and dumped the brown begging foal in there as well. The music was still blaring in the garage when he brought the fluffies inside. The music only frightened the fluffies as they all screamed and cried in unison. He went to the pen area and dumped the fluffies inside. They fell hard and he was worried he had really messed up one of the foals but they all went to their crying out as they got out of their daze.  The pen needed some more stuff but he had to go out on a little excursion so he went to go and grab his keys and his phone until he came up on the box of Halloween decorations. He smiled when he saw the strobe light just sitting there on its side. He picked it up and went to the garage to set it up facing the fluffy pen. He paired the speaker to the laptop on the kitchen table and set the volume on high as the gore growls blared out and caressed the fluffies ears.  He turned around, turned off the lights and left the fluffies screaming in terror in their little chunk of hell as he closed the door on them. Chris laughed to himself as he exited the front door locking it behind him as he could only think that the fluffies time of fright and terror were only just beginning.   
>You are an electrician, and you are freezing your balls off. >Who the hell does construction on a theme park in December anyway? >At least the pay is good. Not too many jobs in the winter, and it seems like everyone and their brother got hired to do this place. >But, man almighty, this is one of the weirdest jobs you’ve ever had to do. >Everything’s flat and level, and all the buildings have foam walls on the lower half >All the outlets are covered by spring loaded outdoor enclosure, even the wall outlets in offices. >And everything is conduits. Not a scrap of wire left behind the walls without shielding. >Something about “Wall spaghetti” whatever that means. >A bit odd, but the customer gets what they want. >Today, you’re finishing the high voltage lines coming in from the substation that the city put in for this place. >All that sweet nuclear power coming from Perry just warms your heart. >Looks like everything checks out here, and it’s about time to throw the switch. >One last check for anything left in the substation. Ladders, tools, lunch boxes… >”Hi mistah! Nummies?” >Fluffy ponies… >You briefly consider flipping the switch anyway and letting the critter roast, but your kid has one of these things and they’re not all bad. >Instead you pick him up by the scruff and hold him to eye level. >”Nuuu!” he squeals, furiously pedaling his legs in the air. “Dun huwt fwuffy!” >”You realize how dangerous places like this are?” you ask the ball of fluff. You turn him back to the substation, then back to your face. >“You would have been vaporized. Annihilated. Exploded.” >”Esp-wode?” says the fluffy. “Wha dat? Soun fun! Fwuffy wan espwode!” >You really don’t have time to argue with a fluffy pony, so you set him down on the ground and boot his fluffy butt away from the substation. >”You big meanie munster!” whines the fluffy. “Jus wan nummies!” >”Yeah, well I want a blow job,” you retort. “You can’t everything you want. Now scram.” >The fluffy blows a raspberry at you and wanders off across the muddy plain. >After locking the fence, you pick up your cell phone and give the power station a call. >”Yeah, we’re ready here,” you tell the station. “Area’s clear, secure, and ready for power.” >You’ve been doing this job for as long as you’d care to remember, and you still get a thrill every time you get to power one of these beasts up. >It’d be better if that fluffy wasn’t tugging on your pant leg. >”I thought I told you to get lost.” >”No get in metaw pwace!” he says. >”Stay out of there, you idiot!” you reply. “Did you want to die?” >”Bu hewd in dere!” he says. >…wat. >Actually, watt. A whole heaping few thousand kilowatts power through the station with the force of a trillion electrons just aching to do work >It’s only a moment before the screams of a dozen ferals reaches your ears and the stench of burnt fluff reaches your nose. >Spells like rabbit, actually. >Luckily, these newer substations are fault tolerant for such things. >A small pop sends four flaming foals from somewhere within the substation. >One lands at your feet, chriping and crying as it tries to escape the flames. >”Fieh no gud fow babehs! Fwuffy gif hugs! Put dem out!” >The fluffy launches himself over to it and tries to hug the flaming foal. >Smothering flames with your body doesn’t work when you’re covered in flammable material. >The fluffy is soon engulfed in a flames of his own. >Instead of running in panic, he simply sits down and stares up at you. >What a serene little fluffy; accepting death like a Buddhist monk. >”Dis onwy da beginin’” he says, as the flames ignite the fat beneath his skin. >”Da end wiww come fow us aww.” >…this fluffy is apparently receiving some sort of enlightenment on his pyre. >”It wiww end da onwy way it can,” he continues, as the flesh melts from his face. <“Fwuffies wiww dwon in da fiehs, an earfs, and wa-was. Aww faww down. Aww wiww pewish." >The charred body of the fluffy slumps to the ground and falls silent >Freakin’ spooky. >”Yo! Donnie! What’s the hold up?” calls your co-worker. “Help us get this shit wired. I’m freezing!” >You walk away, but can’t help looking back at the charred fluffy staring back at you with empty eyesockets. >Freakin’ spooky Uni the Unicorn aka Two Lesbians in a Fluffy Pony Suit: Part 1: At least it pays the bills. Please note that this story is set 10 weeks from the posting date. Also, due to complaints about the length of my stories and people being unable to ‘follow’ who is speaking, I have added different fonts as an experiment. Please tell me if it helps out any. Humans speak in Trechbucket MS Fluffy Ponies speak in Ar Cena >Be a animatronics designer by the name of Natasha Googaluv, ‘Tasha’ to your friends, but instead of your dream job, you ended up flipping burgers. Seemed the market for animatronics had dropped off the map with the advent of CGI. >Fuck CGI, fuck it in it’s pixelated ass. looks like shit, everyone can spot it a mile away. >George Lucas, we’re talking to you. >Have a Gal-Pal called Samantha ‘Sammy’ Connors, who got her doctorate in animal studies, specifically Fluffy Pony Psychology…or more specifically, HOW TO MARKET SHIT TO FLUFFY PONIES AND THEIR OWNERS. >Together you came up with the idea of a quick television show expressely for Fluffy Ponies. >You developed the ‘Fluffy Suit’, while ‘Sammy’ used a host of Fluffy Ponies, tame and feral, Earth Fluffy, Pegasus and Unicorn, to test various colours of fluff and mane and tail until she found the ‘ultimate’ combination. >Basically Princess Molestia colouration. Go figure. >’Ultimate’ meaning incredibly attractive to Fluffy Ponies. Mares want to be ‘just like’ Uni, which caused a trend of Fluffy Pony Mares wandering around with bleached fluff and pale dusky-pink manes., Stallions would give you every spaghetti in the world just to kiss Uni’s hooves, let alone the whole ‘Special Hugs’ bull-crap. >Called it the ‘Uni the Unicorn Show’ and the basic premise was it followed the titular character as she led a Herd of Fluffies in an oversized garden. >How to be good Fluffies and not get the shit knocked out of them by the increasingly short-tempered population. >Thought it might be worth a bit on money. >Turned out to be a lot of money, enough to pay off your university loan fees on the spot and enough money so you could actually buy a house together. Kept your intellectual rights to the character, but sold the show rights to an educational filming house. >Close to six million Fluffy Ponies tune in every morning to watch you. No shit, Six Million Fluffy Ponies. You get more viewers than most Kid Cartoons. >Sell hundreds of thousands of Uni Dolls every month. There are thousands more ‘dolls’ of the other characters in the show, but the Uni Dolls are always in demand. >Minor accident with the chinese production line resulted in them making a Uni-coloured ‘Lyra Doll’. >IE has a silk-lined ‘vagoo’ at the back. The whole thing is filled with foam, so the dolls are easily washed and hung out to air dry, but given the rate at which the Fluffy Ponies go through their dolls, it seems every three months a new Uni the Unicorn doll is ‘required’. >This ‘Error’ makes the dolls all the more desireable to the sick fucks out there. Apparently every Fluffy Stallion. Ever. So the ‘mix up’ line ended up being your primary product. >Preparing for today’s show with Sammy, getting into the costume, which is a two-piece set, with the controls for Uni’s ‘Head’ and ‘Face’ at your end, and the rear end and tail under Sarah’s control. >Hollow aluminium ‘ribs’ prevent the latex ‘skin’ of the suit from falling down on you both, but the suit gets so damn hot …. haven’t figured out how to install air-conditioning in the suit, so can only ‘pilot’ it for about 10-15 minutes outdoors, maybe 20 minutes indoors in the AC. >”So …. why is it you feel compelled to grab my bum like that?” You ask your ‘co-star’, Sammy, grinning around your cigarette. >”Well, you’ve got to hold onto the best things in life, ‘Tasha.” Sarah grins back. >Both of you are wearing day-glo pink bicycle shorts and tank-tops, only clothing small enough and airy enough to wear for long under the Latex Suit without you both passing out from heat-stroke. >The other ‘Actors’ are all men, so they can just wear boxer shorts. Lucky bastards. >”Oi, oi, enough of that crap, we’re filming in ten!” The director shouts. God, the breaks never seem to last long enough on this cheap-ass show. >Back into the suit…yep, Sarah’s fondling your ass again. God dammit, not in the suit! >Today’s script is … Uni and Friends play with the Ball. >Oh God. >Trundle out onto the set, peering out through the small visor under ‘Uni’s’ head. > “Uni” is a Pure Snow-White Fluffy and a dusky-pink mane that comes down to her ‘knees’. No Wings, for Copyright Reasons, of course. >Original version had to be scrapped after the ‘Trained’ Fluffy Ponies got into it. It was salvageable, but the smell just could not be gotten out of the Latex …. >Mares and Foals wriggling through the fluff, telling ‘Uni’ how much they loved her. That wasn’t the bad part …. in fact it was adorable, up until the Stallions turned up. >The Stallions just could not contain their lust. Their Goddess, ‘Uni’, was just lying there, ‘asleep’ and their baser instincts took hold. >Scores of Fluffy Stallions humping Uni’s backside, her belly, her face, every part that they could get to, sending the Mares and Foals shrieking away from their ‘Idol’ in a panic as the lust-driven Males covered every square inch they could find with their own bodies. >Created so much static electricity between their own fluff and ‘Uni’s’ synthetic silk Fluff that they almost reset themselves. Was hilarious to hear the Cleaner describe Fluffies humping furiously then squeaking in alarm as little arcs of static electricity jumped out and ‘zapped’ between Fluffy Ponies. >Their lustful rendition of “EEEENF EEEENF *squeak* EEEEENF!” was enough to make the show filming next door complain to the producers. >Kinda hard to do a somber moment when your actors cannot stop bursting into laughter at two dozen little voices giving vent to their lust and desire a few meters away. >Had to use Humans in Furry Suits after that. Mares and Foals were alright, but the damn Stallions had figured out that ‘Uni’s’ Fluff was the softest of them all, and even if they couldn’t find the ‘Naughty Place’, it still felt good. >Next ‘Show’ you were trying to shoot, live no less, eight of the damn things climbed up your legs and clung to Uni’s backside, thrusting away wildly and proclaiming ‘Softest Pwot Evah!’ >Ad-libbed that they were naughty Fluffies, and made you upset, and should not jump Mares just because the Stallions felt Naughty. >Minor hiccup, censors let it slide as a ‘educational’ video. Damn episode ended up on the internet, passed back and forth by the sick fucks who get their rocks off fucking the Uni the Unicorn dolls. >Stallions were booted out of the set, left to wander the alleyways as strays after that. The Mares and the Foals were rehomed as quickly as possible. You still hear them sobbing in your dreams, that they loved ‘Uni’, why did they have to leave, they were Good Fluffies! >Ended up that Fluffies in Hollywood were quite eager to share their homes with such ‘celebrities’, however, so that ended well. You think. >Poor Sammy was horrified, however. Damn things were hard up against the Latex ‘body’ of the suit and pounding furiously against Sammy’s back and thighs, she still has nightmares of being molested by giant cotton-wool balls some nights. >”Hewwo fwiends, Uni wuv yuu!” You say loudly, manipulating the levers in Uni’s ‘chest’ to make her mouth move in time to your voice. “How awe yuu?” >Lift a leg and ‘wave’ it at the Camera. >Wait ten seconds for the ‘audience’ to wave back. >”Uni happy to see yuu aww again. Today, Uni an’ Fwiends gun be pwayin’ wit Baww! Yuu aww haf yuu Bawws?” You ask as the other actors, on all fours in their ‘Fluffy Suits’, shuffle in, pushing the ‘Baww’ with them. >Actually, it’s a guy in a suit rigged with lights inside a giant inflatable ball with a foot-wide ‘clear strip’ for him to see out of. ‘Baww’ is the friend of the show’s Fluffies. >Another tragedy there. Poor guy could barely see out in the first version of the ‘Baww’, ran over two batches of Foals by accident once. Thankfully You and Sammy had goofed your positioning for the shot and gotten between him and the camera, so that the gory stains weren’t visible. >Man goes through a bottle of Jim after every show after that….apparently there was a Foal whose ribs had penetrated the plastic, and when he tried to roll off stage, the thing kept talking to him, saying “Why Baww nu fun? Why gif owies? Baybeh wuv yuu!” >As some sort of weird self-inflicted penance, the guy has thirty ex-strays living with him in his apartment. >How he manages to not kill himself after listening to all those squeaky voices every evening, you will never know. >”Hewwo Uni, we wuv yuu!” The actors in the smaller Fluffy Suits all say loudly, and the guy in the ball jumps up and down to make the ball ‘bounce’ excitedly. >”An’ Uni wuv aww her fwiends!” You respond, trying to not squeak as Sammy’s hands tease you. “Is Baww weady to pway too?” >The ‘Baww’ bounces up and down vigorously. >Survey says that ‘Baww’ is the second favourite character on your show. >”Den aww Fwuffies pway!” You ‘shout’ happily. >Both you and Sammy lift your legs quickly, clumsily immitating ‘trotting on the spot’. >Makes your suit’s fluff shake about wildly, but apparently it looks good to the Fluffy Ponies, according to Sammy’s tests. >”Awighty den! Fwuffies, push Baww about! Be guud to each otha!” You say as the other Actors start to ‘push’ the giant Ball around the set. ********************************************************************************************************************************* >”You being a good boy, Frank?” Your owner asks from the White-Tiled-Nummies-Place. >”Yes, Mumma, Fwank bein’ guud!” You shout back. Don’t want her coming over here….Naughty Place is so hot right now. Mumma doesn’t like that. Says you are a ‘Dirty Fluffy’ when you have a hot naughty place. >You are a Boy Fluffy with pale brown fluff and black mane and tail. >And you’re watching your favourite show in the world. >Uni the Unicorn. Uni the Magical. Uni the most Beautiful Fluffy in the World! >You went and got your Ball when she asked. >Wave at her when she waves at you. >You’re Uni’s friend, she always says hello to you. She said she loves you again today…. >Oh ….. Uni. She makes you feel so warm and fuzzy inside. >”……Den aww fwuffies pway!” Uni says, in her beautiful voice, and then does the Dance. >”Oooooooooh…..” You groan, watching her Fluff shake around like that, shining under the light, swaying back and forth ….. >No Mare can compare to Uni …. >All the other Stallions at the Play-Ground agree. >When you go over to Dangle’s place, Dangle’s Daddy lets you all watch a moving picture of Uni getting Special Hugged by many Stallions…. >Makes you all angry …. Uni is your (special) Friend! How dare they give her Special Hugs! >Then Uni says she’s sad, she didn’t want to have Special Hugs with Naughty Stallions. >Maybe ….. she wanted to have Special Hugs with Stallions she loved? >Stallions like … you? She says she loves you, every day! >”Mmmph.” You grunt, laying down flat on the couch and watching as Uni and her Friends push the Baww around in their Garden. >The way her legs move … >Your naughty place has been hot for some time now. >The way her Fluff shines ….. >Start to give Special Hugs to the couch. Mumma doesn’t like that, but you just … >The soft, gentle eyes …….. >…. can’t stop yourself! >”Uni … UNI! Fwank wuv yuu …. wan gif Special Huggies.” You whimper softly, eyes glued to the television, and then it happens! >”Uni wuv to pway wit her fwieeeeeeeeeeeeegh!” Uni squeals as her legs get tangled, and she falls onto her face … and her hind-quarters lift into the air. >There’s a tearing noise … and then …. NAUGHTY PLACE! >Uni’s Naughty Place is right there! You can see it, a strip of hot pink colour suddenly showing between her thick, soft white Fluff. >You stop humping the couch. Your whole body tenses. >Uni …. you …. you…… >”FWANK HAF SPECSHAW HUGGIES!” You squeal in delight, propelling yourself off the couch with a burst of lust-powered strength, landing with a grunt on the coffee table then launching yourself forwards again, slapping onto the Television and clutching desperately with your legs. >Uni must want it too! Fluff is all tingly, sticking to the screen. >”EENF EEENF EEEENF!” You groan loudly, thrusting for all you’re worth, but you can’t seem to find her Naughty Place! >”Frank, what in the … FRANK! No! Bad Fluffy! Don’t do that to the Television!” Your Owner shrieks, coming running from the kitchen. >”Nuuu, Uni, Fwank hewe, Fwank hewe to gif Specshaw Huggies!” You protest loudly as your owner tries to pull you off the screen. >”Frank, you’re being bad, stop it!” Your Owner shrieks, her fingers digging deep into your fluff, scratching your skin. >”Nuuuu, Uni wuv Fwank, Fwank wuv Uni, nu take Fwank away fwom Fwank’s Wuv!” You sob as you are finally prised off the television …. and placed into your naughty room. >”Bad Fluffy, Frank, You are a Bad Fluffy!” Your Owner shouts, slamming the door. >You sob and cry. >So close … you were sure, just a few moments more, you would have found Uni’s Special Place and been one with her. >Made her the happiest Fluffy Mare in the world. >Sob and sniffle and drag yourself over to your Uni the Unicorn Doll, and mount it, finding the silky hole that your Owner found so hilarious when she bought it for you. >’Lyra Doll’ she called it. >Silly Owner, Uni isn’t called Lyra! >Have the Good Feels, but it’s not enough. >It’s not the real Uni …. >Hug the Uni Doll to your chest and cry. >Why? Why can’t your Owner understand? >You love Uni…. ********************************************************************************************************************************* >Be a Feral Fluffy. >Your Herd is watching the Magic Picture Boxes. >Well, the Stallions and Colts are, at least. >Mares like to watch Uni the Unicorn too, but they have to watch the Magic Picture Boxes at the other window. >Can’t risk them getting too close right now. >Could give them Special Hugs! >Mares, Fluffy Mummas, Fillies, Old Mares …. none of them would be safe here. >All the Stallions sit just out of hoof-reach, humping the empty air franticly, watching the Magic Picture Boxes. >”Auunnnnnngh! Naugthy Pwace so huwty!” Your Smarty Friend growls in a mixture of pain, lust and frustration. “Why nu can haf Uni? Smawty Fwiend is Best Fwuffy! Haf guud Hewd, biggest pokey thing!” >Lying asshole! Yours is bigger! >Every Stallion thinks that, sometimes out loud. >”Den aww Fwuffies pway!” Uni says, smiling so softly at the Fluffies. >At you, most of all, you’re sure. >”Auuuuungh!” The Stallions groan, thrusting and thrusting without any relief or way of release. >”Fw-fwiends?” a voice asks, meekly. >It’s another Stallion….and his face is wet with tears. >”Fwiends, haf favo … OH! Uni! Duce miss yuu!” He says, running forwards and tapping on the window with his hooves franticly, sobbing and crying. “Uni! UNI! Fowgive Duce! Duce sowwy!” >You growl unhappily. Nobody is allowed to be that close to the Window! Smarty Friend gets the front row, then Toughie Friends like you, then the other Stallions. >Also hurts Fluffy Pony Necks to look up that high like that. >Smarty Friend looks at this ‘Duce’ with a curious expression, however. >”Why yuu wan Uni fowgive yuu?” Smarty Friend asks, still dry-humping the air. “Uni is Best Fwuffy, awways wuv Fwuffies.” >”Duce was Bad Fwuffie!” Duce sobs, still tapping on the window, his eyes fixed on Uni’s shaking fluff. “Duce an’ Fwiends twy to gif Special Hugs to Uni, but she haffin’ sleepy-times.” >Stallions gasp and whisper. Smarty Friend looks stunned. >This Fluffy touched Uni! HAD SPECIAL HUGS WITH YOUR UNI? >”Den we twy haf moar Special Hugs when she pwayin’, but she say we baaaaaad Fwuffies.” Duce whimpers, shuffling back to sit next to your Smarty Friend, big fat tears in his eyes. “Uni’s Hoomin’s throw us out, teww Fwuffies we nevah come back. Duce nevah get chance to teww Uni he sowwy fo’ being a Naughty Fwuffy.” >”Yuu … haf Special Hugs wit’ Uni?” Your Smarty Friend gasps, his hips pumping and thrusting wildly. >Everyone is at once excited, angry and hopeful. >If a weak little Fluffy like this could have Special Hugs with Uni, you could have them too! >Have Special Hugs with Uni! Nnnnn! NNNN! NNNNNNNNNNNNN! >Ooops. Sticky belly fluff….at least you don’t have huwties anymore…. >”Nuu, nu could find her Naughty Pwace.” Duce sighs, closing his eyes and whimpering, but a slow smile spreads across his face. “Buh Uni’s Fwuff …. so soft. Softah den anyting….” >”Softah den Mare Fwuff?” Your Smarty Friend asks hoarsely, inching towards the New Friend. >Everybody is, eager to hear his story. It’s dangerous …. if Fluffies get too close to each other in this state, everyone could start having Special Hugs with Stallions, get stuck together till the sky makes Wa-Was again or their Fluff pulls out! >Nobody is watching Uni anymore. Everyone wants to hear about how this Fluffy Special Hugged her! To have actually touched the Great Uni, and had Special Hugs even…..he is such a Lucky Fluffy! >”How Duce say …. gwound hawd and cowd, and fwuff soft and wamm?” He says, looking at the Herd’s Stallions with that same slow smile. “Weww, Uni’s fwuff makes Mare fwuff feww wike hawd cowd gwound.” >”Feww soooo guud on Naughty Pwace, Duce nu mind nu finding Uni’s Naughty Pwace.” Duce sighs happily. >”Auuunnngh! AUUUUUNNNNNGH! Smawty Fwiend wan haf wots of SPECIAL HUGS WIGHT NOW!” Your Smarty Friend groans loudly. >You want them now too. Just imagining Uni squealing and grunting as you give her Special Hugs and make her Your Mare makes your head spin. >You can’t even grasp the concept of Fluff that could be softer than Mare Fluff. It must be like …. like …… >”Uni wuv to pway wit her fwieeeeeeeeeeeeegh!” Uni squeals as her legs get tangled, and she falls onto her face … and her hind-quarters lift into the air. >There’s a tearing noise … and then …. NAUGHTY PLACE! A strip of hot, vibrant pink appears between her so-soft White Fluff! >Everyone turned to watch as they heard their precious Idol squeal, babbling “Wha huwt Uni!” … and then everyone’s eyes grew so very, very wide. >For a brief second, the whole world goes silent and still for the Stallions….. >”UNI!” The Stallions cried out as one, slipping and scrambling to slap agains the window, thrusting wildly against the glass, and in the case of those in the back rows, against the rapidly pumping and bumping backsides of the Smarty Friend and Toughie Friends. >”Eeeenf! EEEEENF! Whu pokin’ Smawty Fwiend? Eeeenf! Nu do daa-AAAAAAGH! Bad Huggi-EEEEENF, BAD HUGGIES-EEEEEEENF!” Your Smarty Friend howls, but he doesn’t stop trying to give Special Hugs through the window. >You don’t either. >Nobody does. Nobody can stop themselves. >Uni is lying there, her back legs wiggling, but her front legs and head lying down on the ground. >She’s exposed, waiting for you! >Waiting for YOU specifically, you’re sure! >Her Friends are all gathering around, crying out her name, asking if she’s alright. >Magic Picture Boxes flash, and the Angry Man is in the window, shouting at you. >Shouting about getting his windows dirty. >Fluffies squeal and stumble away. >Dirty Sticky Water and Fluff all over the window now. >Mares and Fillies and Foals all squeal and run away to the Safe Place, like they were told if the Angry Man shows his face. >Stallions stagger after them, exhausted and heart-broken. >Just a little more … surely you would have found a way to get to Uni ….. >Wait, Duce is with your Herd, talking to Smarty Friend as everyone waddles towards the broken-down van a few blocks away. >Smarty Friend calls all of the Herd together to say something. >”Fwiends, dis Fwuffy says he know Uni, the Magical Bestest Fwuffy.” Smarty Friend says, waiting for the excited whispering to die off before continuing. “New Fwiend Duce say, he know way into Uni’s Safe Place. Show Hewd the way, buh he need owr hewp to get dere.” >”Fwuffies gu, an’ hewp Duce say Sowwy to Uni.” Smarty Friend shouts loudly, and the whole Herd cheers. “Mares gif Hugs to Duce, make him pwetty. Den make Stallions pwetty, den yuu, den Foals. Nu wan Uni tink we Diwty Fwuffies!” >”Aww Stallions fowwow Smarty Fwiend, haf tawk outside Safe Box.” >All the Stallions shuffle out as the Mares and Fillies pounce on Duce, eagerly grooming him, perhaps a little too well judging by all his yelping, mumbling about why they should help a Stupid New Fluffy apologise, when they could be the ones making Uni love them instead. >”Dat why I Smawty Fwiend, an’ Yuu nuu Smawty Fwiend.” The Smarty Friend scoffs. “We get Duce show Hewd how to Uni’s Safe Pwace, teww her we be Guud Fwuffies, live wit’ Uni…..” >Everyone is humping the air again. Leering at each other, giggling excitedly. >You think you will be a Smarty Friend too, and wait till Herd finds Uni, then you race ahead and give her Special Hugs, make her your Mare first, make her love your Pokey Thing most of all. >All the Stallions think that. >None of them even concieve the notion that any other Fluffy could possibly come up with such a brilliant plan. ********************************************************************************************************************************** >Be ‘Tasha’ Googaluv, Animatronics Expert and Pilot of the Uni the Fluffy Unicorn Suit. Having a panadol to try and get rid of your throbbing headache and the pain of a busted nose. >Everyone is having coffee after a ‘successful’ show, although you’ve decided to pass on the coffee yourself. >Busting your nose on the control panel of the Uni Suit was decidedly painful, and now, everything tastes like blood…. >Just bruised, the First Aid Technician said, but fuck him, you feel like you just got king-hit by King Kong. >Sammy keeps apologising. Wasn’t her fault, the set is old and needs repairs, that pannel of astro-turf has been loose for weeks now. >Director is talking animatedly on the phone, looks excited. >Don’t know why. Studio was overwhelmed with complaints from viewers about Uni ‘flashing’ their beloved Pets, and then having to clean all the spooge off their Televisions. >Apparently, today, you, Sammy and a loose section of astro-turf are responsible for two hundred and eighty three Fluffy Pony Stallion deaths. >Breaking their necks slamming into television cabinets or against the screens themselves, being crushed under televisions as they desperately clung to the screens, apparently several dozen differnet households had their Fluffy Stallions fighting each other to the death for the right to have ‘Special Hugs’ with Uni. >Apparently the Ferals were worse. Every Electronics store in the nation that had TVs playing your show in their front windows are apparently scraping Fluffy Ponies off the windows. >In some cases, litterally, because the little bastards had their fun, and then wouldn’t stop trying to ‘hug’ Uni, and were then cemented to the glass windows. >It would be hilarious if it had happened to somebody else. >That said, sales of ‘Uni Dolls’, especially the Chinese ‘Special Edition’, have reached a new height today. >Five hundred thousand units have been ordered…. >Jesus Eeeenfing Christ. >Oh hell, here comes the Director, probably with another story of another Fluffy Pony owner trying to sue your ass for showing off Sarah’s ass today. >”Ladies and Gents …. Uni the Unicorn just got bought for Eleven. Million. Dollars.” He bursts into laughter, clutching his note-book like it’s the Holy Grail. >For a blessed handful of seconds, stunned silence, and then everyone starts talking all at once. >”Holy shit! How much is our cut?” >”Who the fuck can throw that kind of money around in this economy?” >”Wait, does that mean we just sold out to Fox News?” >”Wooo-Hoooooooooooo!” >”Wait wait wait … what do you mean, ‘sold’?” You shout over the hubub, glaring at the Director. “Our contracts state there’s no sale of proprietary rights without consultation of Sammy and myself first!” Your shouting echoes down the corridors of the filming studio as everyone goes quiet. “Do you Fucktards realise this means we are all now UNEMPLOYED? We were hired by Edu-Max Studios! If the Show has been bought out by another Studio, we’ve just lost our jobs!” >”Calling our Lawyer now.” Sammy snaps, tapping furiously at her IPhone. “If the Board thinks they can fuck us over and walk away shit-free, they’re in for the legal sodomizing of their lifetime!” >”No, no, you two don’t understand!” The Director shouts back, his good humor gone. “That’s Eleven Million dollars for you two!” >”And, what, we’re chopping fucking liver?” One of the other ‘Fluffy’ Actors shouts angrily. >”We were supposed to be fucking consulted about this first!” You swear angrily as your partner finally gets through to the lawyer. “What was the Board thinking? There’s no way in hell this can go through without our permission! It’s a legally binding contract! Uni makes enough money to keep Edu-Max in the black, and they think they can buy us off with a few million shoved in our faces?” >”LISTEN TO ME!” The Director bellows, white-faced. “The Board has sold Uni the Unicorn, no ifs and buts about it. Sammy and Natasha get Elven Million Dollars, as an incentive to push them to agree to the sale, and everyone else gets their full severance pay and a guaranteed position on the new Uni the Unicorn Show! Same contracts as before, with the new company.” >Everyone mutters and whispers, and Sammy is angrily whispering to your Lawyer on her IPhone. >”It’s not widely known to the public, but Edu-Max has been facing a mounting series of legal challenges from a collection of small Asian Movie Studios about the Seven Fluffy Samurai spoof-series being filmed here, and we’re still fighting a hostile take-over by the Fuwafuwa Ponīfechigurūpu Consortium. The Board is likely going to succeed in over-turning the challenges and keep the Consortium off their backs, but the cost to hire a decent legal defence has eaten up the Studio’s cash reserves because the litigation just won’t die off. It’s like these bastards have a bottomless pit of money to throw at us, and the shareholders are getting antsy about the Fuwafuwa Ponīfechigurūpu’s continuous attempts to buy the studio outright.” The Director continues, manages to get most of the crew’s, if not everyone’s, attention focused on him. “Do you understand, Natasha? The Board has no other choice but to sell off their biggest cash-cow, or the entire Studio has to close. I get you’re pissed, but it’s sell Uni’s copyrights or everyone loses their jobs.” >………… >Silence but for Sammy’s angry whispering. Everyone has turned to stare at you, tight-lipped and pale-faced. >You rub at your bruised nose and groan. Of course. Of fucking course. >”And this ties in to the hostile take-over bid by that Japanese Consortium, the Fuwafuwa Ponīfechigurūpu? The legal challenge against that Fluffy-themed comedy as a Slander against Asian Film History?” You grunt, snorting a half-clotted blockage out of your nose. “Bleed us dry through legal action by a group of their teritary businesses, then snap us up when we’re on the rocks for a song?” >”As best as the Board can understand, yes, but you have to Understand, this buyout does not come from overseas. We’ve been bought by a private individual up north, near the Canadian Border, to feature Uni the Unicorn as a mascot for a Theme park.” The Director replies, looking markedly less panicked now. Probably thought you were going to storm the Office and punch out the Board. >You might just do that, but first, you’ll hear the terms of the buy-out. >”As per your contracts, you are not permitted to use Social Networking or any other form of mass-media information dissemination devices to forward this information, but the show is such a hit with the Fluffy Ponies and their owners that some group has decided to build a theme-park to cash in on the craze, and Uni is apparently going to be the big draw-card while their Theme Park is in the teething phase.” The Director hands over his notepad to the nearest Actor, who begins reading the pad eagerly, his neighbours leaning over his shoulder. “The Park itself won’t be ready for another three months, and they’re keeping the actual name and ‘theme’ very close to their chest, but the Show is being re-written as Uni and Friends walking north to this ‘Theme Park’ … and every week, Fluffy Ponies and their Owners can write in and ask Uni questions and the chance to win free tickets to the opening day of the theme park.” >”Nice ….” The Actor grunts, handing the pad over to the next worker. “But seriously, a Multi-Species Theme Park?” >”Hey, Uni the Unicorn makes a annual turn over of close to three million a year just in advertising.” Somebody else points out. >”Our role as such will be to film Uni the Unicorn as she visits various places on her trip up North. We are not allowed to give away any information except what’s on the script we are to be emailed every day. Hell, I don’t even know where the damn thing is being built.” The Director replies with a shaky laugh. >”MOTHER FUCKING ASS SHIT BALLS! You completely useless turd-packer!!” Sammy explodes, almost throwing her IPhone at the wall. “Dammit! Nat, our Lawyer says he can’t help. He’s been brought in under contract by our Mystery Buyer. Says he can’t help us due to a ‘conflict of interest’, and he’s legally bound to be unable to provide the Buyer’s details… except for a phone number we can ring.” >Everyone stares at Sammy, then you. >Rub at your busted nose and swear. >Today is not going to be a good day. ********************************************************************************************************************************** >It’s so easy when you’re Eeeeevil …… >Dammit, there goes the phone. >Brand new this day, no way to trace it to you. >Hit the button on your desk that will ‘modulate’ your voice and make it sound like the standard creepy ‘Mysterious Caller’ Hollywood loves to use. >”Hello?” You say, grinning as you hear the deep, heavy ‘Hello’ echo back at you. >”Alright, who are you, and what the fuck do you want with us?” A woman angrily demands. >Heh. Right to the point, eh? >”Well, Miss Natasha Googaluv is it? I represent a certain … group, that wishes to utilize the appeal of your character to bring wealth and prosperity to my city.” You sigh, leaning back in your chair and indulging yourself with an audible chuckle. “Uni the Unicorn is the biggest hit in live-action Television since Monkey Magic … oh, forgive me, you’re too young to have seen that. Well, needless to say, she has quite the pull for our … ahem … ‘Target Audience’?” >”Fine, whatever. But the contracts remain as what we had with Edu-Max media, word for word? Nobody is getting fired?” The firey woman snaps. You can hear her angrer in every word. “And what’s the deal with all of this Cloak-and-Dagger bullshit?” >Good, good, let the Hatred flow through you …. >”Of course not. We’d hardly be so foolish as to meddle with what seems to be a fantastic television forumla. However … I must ask, when will you be bringing the other two Fluffies into the show? We feel they would be an excellent addition to Uni, and appeal to an even broader Market-Share.” >…………………………………. >Silence on the phone. >Yes, choke on that, you bitch. I know all about your little backup plans…. >”Also, given the current … financial straights our fair state is in, announcing our Goal now would prove …. problematic. In short, we have no intention to let the Fluffy out of the Bag, not until we are certain that our Theme Park will truly be the first, and greatest, Multi-Species Theme Park on Earth.” >”How did you …. no, nevermind. Alright, fine. You want the other two Suits up and running, fine, but it’ll take at least two days to get them to a workable state, let alone repair the damage done to the Uni costume after today’s fubar.” Resignation in her voice. Excellent. She gave up far faster than you had anticipated. >Good. That means you can keep the other dirty little secrets you dug up about her ready for any future ‘rebellions’. >”Oh, don’t be concerned. We have already taken the liberty of forwarding the specifications to a professional animatronics studio….” Twist that Knife, just for the fun of it. “….and we are informed that all three suits will have been built by tomorrow morning to our exact specifications.” >…………………………. is that the sound of teeth grinding against each other you hear? >”Please, Miss Googaluv, feel free to contact us at any time you need any further assistance. This is a partnership, after all….” >Hang up before she can respond. >….and no-one loves you when you’re Eeeeeeeevil ……. I’m lying through my teeth! Your tears are all the company I need! >It’s a fantastic day to be an Abuser. ********************************************************************************************************************************** >Be Natasha Googaluv. >Be Pissed Off to the point you could choke somebody to death, right here, right now, if you get pushed one inch further. >The three Fluffy Pony suits are ready, as the asshole promised. They’re perfect …. makes you so pissed off. If you’d had the money to get your home-based animatronics work-shop geared up to modern standards, you could have built these …. FUCK! >Fucking perfect designs … how in the hell did he get hold of the schematics? They were on a hard-drive in a safety deposit box, completely unconnected to the outside world…. >All the other Actors are pissing themselves laughing, well, except Sammy, who is having hysterics in the corner. >Exact Specifications? Fucking asshole! The suits are ‘anatomically correct’. >Uni the Unicorn now has two teats located just under her back legs, and a fully ‘working’ vagoo. The other two have the sheath-like ‘equipment’ of a Stallion, plus two large fluffy nuts each. All three suits are visibly ‘Gendered’ now. >Every time the ‘Uni’ suit moves, her tail will ‘swish’ from side to side and give a tantilizing glimpse of her ‘equipment’, and the mechanisms that have hooked up her back legs to her tail will ensure that there’s no way to disable this ‘feature’ in the time you have until the Show starts. >Latex Horse Vagoo. A God-Damned working latex horse vagoo. The Hell? Do these bastards shop at BadDragon.com? >Checks on ‘Eddy’ and ‘Pip’ also confirm their ‘additional extra’s’ also work. Two-Foot Long horse-cock dildos in the under-slung ‘sheaths’ on the bellies of their suits….. >FUCKING JESUS EEEENFING CHRIST! What kind of sick fucks hold your baby’s future in their hands? The Media is going to have a goddamn field-day with this! >The two other suits, the ones you were sitting on in case the Uni the Unicorn show started to ‘slow down’ in the ratings are Eddy the Earth Fluffy and Pip the Pegasus. >Eddy is a massive suit, easily twice as ‘thick’ in the body as Uni, and possessing dark green fluff with lighter green mane and tail. >Pip is slightly smaller than Uni, with a piebald brown-and-white pattern and darker brown mane and tail. >Controls are roughly the same as your original suit, but digital now, rather than your old level and pulley system. >Also, whoever made the suits also seems to have come up with a ‘counter’ to the Heat Issue, by running small tubes of water over and around the pilots, it keeps the suits’ internal temperatures at ‘uncomfortably hot’ rather than ‘cooking you alive’. >Sammy is still in the corner, having hysterics. She’s the one at the ‘business’ end, after all, and given how Fluffy Pony Stallions reacted to yesterday’s fubar, she’s imagining the horrors that will be inflicted on her when they see the ‘new additions’. >Knows enough about Fluffy Pony ‘Psychology’ to understand that large, firm teats are a massive turn-on to Stallions. The whole point of the Uni suit was to make her attractive, but you both underestimated the sex-drive of the Fluffy Pony Stallions….. >Add Uni’s normal sex appeal, plus her newly installed and working ‘equipment’, you’ll need a fire-truck on permanent stand-by to keep the Stallions from attacking now. That or fucking marines with belt-fed M-60s firing a continous stream of rubber bullets! >”Well …. fuck. It could have been worse. At least we all still have jobs.” One of the other Actors grumbles as he’s hooking into the back half of ‘Eddy’. “Oh jesus, there’s a button in here labeled ‘swag’. What’s happening on the outside?” >”You just grew a Fluffy Pony boner, that’s what. PUSH IT AGAIN!” You holler back, facepalming. >Dear Eeeeenfing Christ, they even made the ‘equipment’ self lubricating … >Finally, everyone is suited up. Nervous tittering from everyone. Show is in two hours, and you’ve only just recieved the script …. and it’s from a ‘Ghost’ Address, meaning no way to back-track who your Mystery Boss is ……… >Fuck! >Act 1 of the script is having to ‘break the news’ to the Fans that Uni is going on a Road Trip. In front of a Live Audience outside the front of Edu-Max’s studio…. >Then you have a ‘dance’ to do. Something to show off the new suits. >’Pip’ and ‘Eddy’ will be hold giant ‘kazoos’ in their mouths, while ‘Uni’ will be singing. >It’s all pre-recorded, you just have to dance in time to the music. Songs will ‘play’ out of your suit’s ‘mouth’, and the music out of Pip and Eddy’s ‘Kazoos’. >Quick coreography lesson, takes about an hour and a half to get everyone performing at acceptable levels. It’s easy enough for you and Sarah, but the other two suits and pilots haven’t had months of practice working together. >It’s clumsy and awkward ‘dancing’ at it’s kindest description, but it’s for Fluffy Ponies, they’ll eat it up like spaghetti. >Swallow your rage and frustration, and channel ‘The Uni’. >Half an Hour to practice your lines with each other before the show starts. >Sammy is clinging to your backside, giggling hysterically. >”My ass, my ass, Fluffy Ponies are going to poke me in the ass!” She titters nervously. “Oh God, I’m never going to be able to get married!” >Not in this State, at least. You think bitterly before starting practice off. ********************************************************************************************************************************** >Be a Fluffy Mare. >Daddy has brought you to Uni’s Magical Show, to meet Uni herself! >You can’t stop hugging him or making ‘squeeeeeee’ noises, you’re that excited. >Uni is so Magical, so Beautiful, so Kind, you want to be just like her. >Even put up with baths and Daddy’s Noisy Hot Air Toy so that Nice Ladies can make your Fluff that pristine, perfect white like Unis, and so they can dye your mane the same dusky-pink. >Your Special Friend liked that a lot. >You liked it too …. but your name is Caramel, not Uni. >Why can’t he ever remember that? Why does he have to shout “UNI!” during Special Hugs like that? >Lots of Fluffies are coming to the show, Uni has something important to say, the News-Hoomin said. >Maybe she’s going to say something to you? >Oh! Maybe she’s going to say you’re a Good Friend? >You’d be so, so very happy! You love Uni, she’s everything you ever want to be! Smart! Pretty! Brave! Funny! >Fluffies in the arms of their Hoomins, like you, cheer and wave, all but bouncing in the safety of those big, strong arms. >Hundreds more Fluffies are crammed into the car-park, babbling and hugging and cheering. Some have Collars, but most are Bad Fluffies who don’t live with Hoomins. >Some are trying to be nice, but Daddy says Bad Fluffies have Nasty Biting Bugs and will steal your toys. >Want to give them Hugs, teach them to be Good Fluffies, be like Uni, but Daddy says no. >Fluffies ask if you are Uni. Some are crying, saying they want to meet her. >Tell them you are not, you just made pretty like her. Promise them that Uni will be here soon, she said so. >Be good until then. >Daddy says you’re just like Uni. >Makes you squeeeeeeee again. YAY! Be like Uni! >Stupid Special Friend is in the crowd of Fluffies, up near the front, fighting with the other Stallions. >Mares and Foals, mostly, filling up three quarters of the car-park. >The Stallions …. are all up at the front, pushing, squabbling, wrestling for position. Shouting at each other, bawling that they have Owies, why is Uni not here, that they love her more than anything …. >There’s a padded wall just in front of the stage, high enough that a Fluffy Pony can see over it, but not climb. Too heavy for Fluffies to push over, too smooth for them to climb up. >Daddy says it’s to stop Bad Fluffies from trying to give Uni hugs without her permission. >At first you found that strange, but then, Uni is just one Fluffy, and there are so many Stallions down there, and they’re all acting soooooo mean. >”Fwuffie heww since bright ball stop sweepin’! I gif Huggies fiwst!” One shouts indignantly as those behind him try to drag him back from the Padded Wall. >”Yuu aww Bad Fwuffies! Uni wuvs me, ME!” A big purple Fluffy shouts angrily, flailing at the other Fluffies crushing around him with his hooves. “Yuu nu wuthy of Uni’s wuv! Onwy Smawty Fwiend wuthy!” >”UNI! Where Uni? Duce wan tawk to Uni!” A little Silver Fluffy whines, jumping up and down at the back of the Stallion-Pack. “Why Fwiends nu hewp Duce wike dey pwomise?” >There’s a good three meter distance between the Mares and Foals and the Stallions. >The Mares keep apart enough that they can all dance and play, keep their Foals close by, but still talk. >Stallions scrunch up so tight they are all standing on their hind legs, pushing forwards, fighting and pushing and nibbling each other’s ears. >Finally …. THEME MUSIC! >There’s Uni, and she looks …. different. Even more beautiful than before! >”Fwiends! Uni so gwad yuu come to see Her!” Uni says loudly, waving a leg at the assembled Fluffies. >”HEWWO UNI!” The Mares and Foals cheer. >”AUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNGH!” The Stallions groan, making a weird little bouncing-thrusting dance. >”Nuuu, Fwuffies be guud, nu fite!” Uni says loudly again, shaking her head and making tut-tut-tut noises. “Uni hewe to teww Fwuffies Big News! Pwease nu fite, or Uni haf to go back inside Safe Pwace….” >Mares and Foals boo, shout that Stallions are going to ruin it for everyone. >Stallions sob and shuffle back…oh. Everyone has Naughty Places. Stallions are so ashamed, Uni only just showed up, and now she’s telling them to be good already. >”We wuv yuu, Uni! Pwease, nu weave us!” A Stallion whimpers, sobbing big fat tears. >”Uni nu guu ‘way, if Fwuffies pwomise to be guud.” She promises, her eye-lashes fluttering at the Stallions. >All the Stallions bleat excitedly, then crouch down. >Can hear the Mares giggling. The ‘Uni Look’ maked them behave like Colts having their first Hot-Need-Feels time. >See your Special Friend at the back of the Stallion-Pack, crouched down low, looking back at you with an apologetic expression. >Good. See how he feels now. Uni told him to behave. Stupid Special Friend! >”Uni haf news fo’ Fwiends! Uni going to New Safe Pwace … haf to weave, miss aww fwiends hewe, but Uni nu gun weave yuu behind!” She says loudly, as the Fluffies turn and chatter to each other, worried and confused. >Uni is leaving? But she says she’s not leaving you behind? >”Uni is going ‘NOWTH’, to New safe Pwace! Uni gon’ send wots o’ Moving Pictures to her Fwiends on the Magic Picture Boxes their Mummies and Daddies have, so Fwiends knuu where Uni is goin’!” Uni giggles and trotts on the spot, and the Stallions groan and sigh. >”Buh Uni not goin’ awone! Say hewwo to Uni’s Big Brudda and Lil Brudda!” The Magical Goddess says brightly, happily. >Stallions look pale. >Mares and Foals gasp excitedly. >Uni has Brothers? Oh, oh, this is fantastic! >You’re squeeeee-ing so hard that Daddy can barely keep hold of you. >Out comes the perkiest, and biggest, Pegasus you’ve ever seen, all gangly legs and awkward, bobbing head. Must be a Colt! >He’s sooooooo cute! >”Dis Lil Brudda, Pip!” Uni cheers, waving a leg at Pip, who flutters his wings and bows to the Fluffies. >”Hewwo, fwiends! Uni teww Pip ’bout yuu, Pip wan be yuu Fwiend too!” He even sounds like an adorable colt too! >Everyone cheers and waves back, but the Stallions seem a little forced. >They can see something that’s making them sad …. >”…..an’ dis Big Brudda, Eddy!” Uni cheers again, and you go still as a stone. >Every Mare and Fillie goes still. >Stallions start to swear. See one stand up, leaning on the Fluffies in front of him and shout “Dat nu faiw! How Fwuffies suppose to beat dat?!”. >Biggest, muscliest, sexiest Earth Fluffy you’ve ever seen stomps out onto the stage and stands next to Uni, nearly dwarfing his Sister and Brother. >”Hewwo, fwiends.” He rumbles in the deepest, sexiest voice ever. “Eddy wuv wittle Fwuffies, do wittle Fwuffies wuv him?” >”WE WUV YUU!” The Mares and Fillies all shriek at the top of their lungs, startling the Foals and Colts still scattered amongst them. Stallions cower on the ground and cry and whine about ‘Unfaiw!’ and ‘Cheatin’ Fwuffies!’ >You have stopped squeeeee-ing now and are desperately shouting to Eddy that you love him! Uni is wonderful, Pip is cute, but Eddy! Oh! Eddy, Eddy, EDDY, EDDY! >Your little legs move franticly, desperate to get purchase. >You want to go up and nuzzle his sexy chest right now. >Oh, Celestia, what a Flank! >”D-dammit! Caramel, calm down!” Your Daddy complains as he struggles to hold you. >”EDDY! Wuv yuu! CARAMEL WUV YUU!” You squeal at the top of your little fluffy lungs. >”Caramel!” Daddy complains as the other Hoomins stare at you both. ********************************************************************************************************************************** >Well, this is the crap-storm of the century. >Thankfully, the cameras aren’t pitched low enough to see all the additional ‘equipment’ everyone is packing. >The Stallion-pile at the front, however …. >Saw Uni’s full, round teats and went into screaming over-drive until you chided them. >Then Pip came out, and they saw the package he had, and went quiet. >Then Eddy came out, and their sullen silence turned into simmering rage and jealousy. >The Mares, on the other hand, are cheering and whistling. You can barely hear yourself talk over the Mares squealing for Eddy to come over and give them Hugs. >Jesus Eeeeenfing Christ. >”Fwuffies! FWUFFIES! Uni haf moar to say!” You shout, and the Mares and Fillies slowly calm down. >Ladies, contain your orgasms, please! >”Before Uni and Bruddas gu on Wong Twip, Uni wan’ do someting speshaw fo’ aww hew Fwiends!” You say to the ‘Crowd’, who are now all fixated on you once more. “Uni haf pwacticed wong an’ hawd fo’ dis, so pwease, nu noisy-tawk tiww Uni finish, pwease?” >That’s the cue. Slightly modified ‘Pinkie Keen’ instumental music, with the Eddy and Pip playing the Kazoos in ‘tune’ to where the additional voices in the song’s chorus would normally be. >As Fluffy Ponies shout they will be quiet, then start turning around to shush each other, the Stage Hands rush out to clamp the giant ‘kazoos’ into Eddy and Pip’s mouths, and a headset and microphone to ‘Uni’s’ head. >All of which are just props, the acutal speakers are located inside the suits’ mouths. >”Uni sing! Fwuffies can’ dance, jus’ no make Noisy-Tawk, oh-kay!” You say one last time as the music starts, and all three ‘Super Fluffies’ start to dance from side to side in time to the music. >”Ooooooh … Uni wuv her Fwiends, an’ Uni wan to pway….” You ‘sing’ as ‘Eddy’ and ‘Pip’ sway back and forth, pretending to play their Kazoos in tune to your singing. “An’ Uni wan to smile an’ wun but sowwy, not toooo-day!” >Fluffies bobbing and dancing on the spot, being relatively silent, totally fixated on your Suits, big, brilliant smiles plastered across their faces. >Okay, so far so good, but the song calls for you to start turning around and around….. >Crap, here goes! >”Cause Uni on a Jour-ney…” You ‘sing’ as you do a full 360 degree spin … slowly. >”Fwuffie see teats!” A Stallion gasps excitedly as you, Eddy and Pip turn side-on to the Fluffy Crowd. >”An’ Uni haf go far….” you are almost 180 degrees now…. “Buh Uni nu gon’ weave you, Fwiends, nu Uni far too smawt!” >”PWOT!” Another shouts excitedly as your rear comes into view, but thankfully the music is loud enough that none of the cameras hopefully picked it up. >”An’ Uni send you pic-tuwes, an Uni wead yuu mail! An’ Uni an’ her Bruuuuuud-das wiww see yuu aww some day!” You keep singing as you turn around to face the crowd … and barely stop from tripping over your own feet. >Stallions have forgotten your request. They’re all scrunched up against the padded barrier, grunting, groaning, pounding desperately on the smooth plastic padding with their hooves, foam and tongues hanging out of their mouths. >Can barely hear them over the ‘music’ and the ‘Kazoos’ being played by ‘Eddy’ and ‘Pip’, but you understand the gist of it. >Fluffy Orgy Pile not two meters from you. >Thank All the Gods that Sammy can’t see this. >”When Uni finds hew pwace, and Bruddas safe an’ sound, den Uni send dah Word to Fwuf-fies, aww across dah towns!” shimmy, shimmy …. oh God, there’s at least a dozen Stallions either dead or unconscious from being squashed in the mob, rag-dolling around as the bodies around them trash and hump and push. >”An’ fwiend can fowwow Uni, to dah Shiny New-Bright Town! So Fwuffies nu be sad, an’ Fwuffies stay wite dere! Cause Uni an’ her Bruddas gonna show yuu how to get rite dere!” >The Mares and Foals are cheering, dancing all over the place, hugging each other. >The Stallions can’t hold it in anymore. Streamers of … oh God no … shooting up into the air. >Thankfully the Stage Hands are there to help, and start the ‘fire works’ early. >Fire works being hundreds and hundreds of Party-Poppers set on the other side of the barrier. >Streamers and bright sparks fill the air, causing the Stallions to squeal, some in fear, most in delight, their lust overtaken for the moment by their normally child-like natures. >Hopefully the Cameras from the News Networks won’t catch all the streams of fluffy semen amongst the paper streamers…. >”YAAAAAAAY! Fwuffies aww guud dancahs!” You cheer, shuffling from leg to leg, and ‘Eddy’ and ‘Pip’ throw their heads around and prance around on stage. “Yuu aww Guud Fwiends! Uni so wucky to haf such Guud Fwiends!” >”We wuv yuu!” The Fluffies cheer back … oh crap! >Seems that some of the Stallions figured out that if they can climb on the backs of the front-row stallions, they can climb over the barrier! >Stage Hands try to grab the Fluffies, but there’s close to a hundred, all scrambling over the barrier and charging towards you. >”Uuuuuuuunnnnnnneeeeeeeehhhhhhhh!” They squeal happily, doing a strange butt-dragging dance …. oh god. It’s a forest of wiggling pink two-inch fluffy weiners charging at you! >Looks like the ‘additions’ to Uni’s backside had the worst possible effect. >”Nuuu, Bad Fwuffies!” You ‘squeal’ as Eddy and Pip rush forwards, ‘blowing’ their Kazoos at the charging Stallions, most of whom squeal and pee themselves in fright as the sheer volume up-close rattles them. >Several Smarty Friends squabble , pushing and shoving and arguing over who you ‘wuv’, but there’s a Silver Fluffy Stallion shuffling forwards, bawling at the top of his lungs. >”Nuu, Bad Fwuffies, nu wan haf Hugs now, haf Hugs afta Show.” You say loudly. >”Nuuuu, Uni, Duce wan’ say sowwy!” The Silver Stallion cries loudly, big fat tears dropping out of his eyes to splash down on the stage. >Can’t kick him off stage, that would ruin Uni’s image, and the Stage Hands are having enough issues trying to get the Ferals off the stage without getting in the way of the cameras. >Wait … Duce? Duce, name seems familiar…. >”Wat Fwiend sowwy for?” You ask, ‘dropping’ Uni’s head down closer to the ground to be at ‘eye level’ with the Feral. >”Duce wuv yuu, Uni! Is why Duce gif Special Huggies! Buh nu wan yuu be Saddies!” ‘Duce’ whimpers, plopping down on his belly just a foot from your ‘head’. “Duce wait fo’ days to say sowwy, but Meanie Hoomins say Duce nu awwowed back inside nu moar! Duce wait an’ wait, wan say Sowwy to Uni!” >”Oooooooooh.” You say loudly. “Uni wemembah Duce. Duce was Naughty Fwuffie who make Uni cwy, wuin show…” >Look up and blink as you hear Fluffy Ponies all shouting “Dat Bad Fwuffie! He make Uni cwy!”. >Crap. Duce is so close the microphones in ‘Uni’s’ head are picking up his comments. >Have to ad-lib the fuck outta this. >”Uni fowgiff Duce … but Duce nu gif Special Huggies if nu towd it okay.” You say in your best ‘sorry boy’ voice, shuffling forwards to plant Uni’s ‘lips’ on Duce’s head as his head hangs down low, the little silver Stallion sobbing his heart out. “Uni wuv yuu, Duce, but Uni wuv yuu as Fwiend, nu as Special Fwiend. Uni is waitin’ fo’ One Twue Special Fwiend.” >”I …. I …. w-waaaaaaaaaaah!” Duce shudders, then starts crying, and you and Sarah ‘kneel down’ in front of him, using Uni’s ‘Head’ to pull Duce up against Uni’s chest and give him cuddles. Can feel his little legs grab Uni as the little Silver Stallion burys his face in your fluff and cries over his broken heart. >Stallions are all staring at you, wide-eyes, mouths open, tails lifted, absolute joy shining in their eyes. >Mares are squeaking and squealing, hugging each other and so very, very excited. >”Oh, Gods, ‘Tasha, what have you done?” Sarah whispers from the back end, nails digging into your skin. >Crap. >You just accidentally gave every desperate Stallion in America an opening to apply for the position of Uni’s Special Friend. ********************************************************************************************************************************** >Somewhere else. >You are a Fluffy Pony Stallion, on the couch with your Lyra Doll watching the end of Uni’s Concert, and your mind is just a blurr of half-finished thoughts and plans. >So many things, to say, to do, to plan ….. >But first….push the Lyra doll off the couch, and crawl up to the top of the couch to peer into the kitchen, where Mummy is making breakfast for her Foals. >”MUMMY!” You cry out loud. “Whewe Fwank’s Cwayons and Papahs be! Fwank haf wetta to wite! Need Wittle Stamp Papers tuuuuuuuu!” >”To who, Frank?” Mummy asks with surprise. >”To Uni! She say Fwank is her One Twue Speshaw Fwiend!” You say eagerly, grinning maniacally, tail wiggling franticly. >You can’t wait for Uni to read your letter, she’s going to love you for sure!